An open apology to Caitlin

I am so sorry for cheating on you and being embarrassed by your open and shameless expressions of love for me. you taught me how to see through made up concepts.

There is another way in which girly music transformed me.

I was a terrible boyfriend to a girl who deeply loved and cared for me in 2009 - 2010: Caitlin.

She demonstrated to me what true love looks like. She saw through all the empty concepts and was never held back in how she expressed her love.

And I was so fucked up in the head that I was embarrassed by that.

I can’t even fucking believe that.

She loved me so shamelessly, and I cheated on her.

I am so fucking sorry Caitlin.

I love you and wish you all the best.

I am so deeply grateful to the girly music that woke me up to my own inner radiance, helped me cut through my own demonic tendencies and attachments, and woke me up to the light and love I am finally ready to share with the world.

I love you all.

I told you Caitlin: I am paying penance now, and I always will be.

I love you.

I hope you are so happy: you deserve all the best.

An open apology to Emily

from spike to eloise: phoebe bridgers, claire cottrill, and i